Will Miss #392 - dads do the time if they do the crime

Many moons ago, I had an American co-worker with a Japanese boyfriend who was looking at a visa that was soon to expire and no full-time job to gain sponsorship from. The boyfriend wasn't ready to get married so a spouse visa looked rather out of bounds. Fortunately for her, she got pregnant. Voila, problem solved! Most Japanese men will marry a woman if she gets pregnant and wants to keep the baby. This is not because of some moralistic notion that god will smite them if they sinned outside of wedlock or an antiquated notion that a bastard child is a terrible thing. It's because they take responsibility for the consequences of their actions. Back home, we see that a lot of men will do everything in their power to escape this type of responsibility and it is definitely no longer the case that a pregnancy will result in a wedding.

I don't think people should marry merely because a baby is in the mix, but I do like the fact that the overwhelming majority of Japanese men put the welfare of the family before their own selfish needs and will tend to marry a woman if they get her pregnant. I will miss the way in which men take this responsibility seriously. 

Will Miss #288 - "shikataganai" (the good)

When faced with hardship or a difficult situation, the Japanese have an attitude of "shikataganai" (or "shoganai") or "it can't be helped". When translated into mere words, it comes across as passive acceptance of the inevitable, but the thinking is more pervasive and applied more subtly to experiences in life. It is about acceptance, but it is also about taking things as they come with equanimity rather than casting about for someone or something to blame. It is a mindset that contributes to an attitude of personal responsibility and the sense that one should not and cannot constantly fight whatever comes your way. Things happen, and we sometimes just have to live with it and not let it control our happiness.

I'll miss the part of "shikataganai" thinking which has people responding to the inevitable with maturity and composure, and how it contributes to taking responsibility.

Won't Miss #138 - no one taking responsibility

Back when I was working in a Japanese office, we had continuous difficulties with things that were not getting done because the person who should look after that particular duty was not exactly specified. There were plenty of ridiculously obvious problems that could be solved in a short time with almost no effort that would be ignored because no one was willing to just do it without some sort of official authorization. This would include things like throwing out an old, abandoned computer that was in everyone's way, cleaning the microwave oven when it was covered in food spatters, or tracking inventory to make sure we had enough materials for clients (or didn't order more of material that we had too much of). Like the chair in the middle of the mob of people pictured above, people would go around a problem that could easily be solved if someone would just take it upon themselves to just deal with it. Japanese people don't just take things upon themselves for the most part because they are unwilling to risk the illusion that they are usurping someone's prerogative.

I won't miss the tendency of people to go around a problem just so they don't have to take responsibility for taking the initiative without authorization.